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Speak soon, Sal.

46 A Mother and her Baby

46 A Mother and her Baby

Overheard on the train from London to Cambridge
This is from the first five minutes of a journey.
The woman did not stop.
I felt so incredibly sorry for this kid.
Prattled at till he the poor kid nearly went mad.
I nearly went mad with her hypnotic language, I willed her to shut up.
I was not successful.

Here she goes:

Let me give you just the bread.
Do you like the bread with the lettuce?
Do you want some egg?
You’re not keen on that?
Do you want some egg?

Egg?
Egg and cress?
You don’t like Cress?
It’s not so bad.
We can grow that.
We can grow that cos you can eat it.

Oh.

You seem to be rejecting quite a lot here.
Was that not to your taste?
Why don’t you have this bit?
Why don’t you just have the bread?
You want the whole sandwich?
Bacon. Do you want the bacon?

Good?
Can’t eat it?
You’ve been doing a good job of eating.
Good?
At the other end, we’ll get a taxi to grannie’s house.
A prawn?
No? Can’t be persuaded.
I’m going to eat my sandwich instead if you don’t mind.

What will Granny make for dinner?
Bacon? Bacon is nice.
Do you want some fruit?
Do you want to sit here and look out the window.
Sit on me?
It’s fun.
Want a piece of mango?
Does Buster eat mango?
Bite. Use those teeth.
Use those sharp teeth.
It’s gone black. We’re in a tunnel.
Come out again.
What can you see.
How is it?
I understand that.
Chips are delicious.
I think these are done.
Come and sit here.
Do you want some pineapple as well?
That bag is all done.
Snacks are done.
I’ve also got a banana. What else.
An orange?
What else did I bring?
A sweet potato smoothie.
Yummy. Delicious?
Shall we share?
Look at this. In my view, that’s the nicest one.
Look at that.
I can chomp up bits.
Delicious? Too big?
That piece is really big.
Do you want to go in your buggy and have a sleep?
Where is your buggy? Were you worried?
Do you want to have a sleep?

A sleep?

 

47 365 Perfect Peaches

47 365 Perfect Peaches

45 A Love Letter

45 A Love Letter